baby it's cold outside

There's nothing quite like waking up on the floor of a hotel in Soho to the season's first snow storm, a view of midtown Manhattan while Matt Bender is blasting the hit winter classic "Baby It's Cold Outside" on the computer speakers.

A few hours earlier we were sitting by the same window watching the night lights of midtown and the Empire State Building sipping on various cocktails. Twist was in town from Portland, OR for work, staying at the Soho Grand. Last time he was in town we ate and drank $200 worth of Mexican, and I was left on a roof in alphabet city.

After Bender finished up his tuna tar-tar at the hotel bar, we went to watch the lights and booze ourselves silly from Twist's 14th floor hotel room. Bender began telling us about his escapades gallivanting around manhattan, clubbing until 11 am, his new liking for house music and life as FDNY.

In fact he was at the hotel the night before to see Twist. I guess Twist wasn't ready for a night with Bender, so Bender went down to the hotel bar with a buddy of his. They sat down next to a wealthy-looking Russian dude and two Russian chicks. Bender joined their conversation and had a few jack and gingers. He said they were all joking and laughing together when all of a sudden the two chicks started making out with each other, unbuttoning their pants, etc. right in the middle of the bar. Bender and his buddy just looked at each other in disbelief. After a while the chicks left with the wealthy Russian dude. Bender and his buddy just sat there with their drinks wondering if what they saw was real. He actually had to ask the bartender if this event actually occurred, to which the bartender concurred.

Bender was serving up cocktails in the room with all his might, or with a heavy hand as he might say. Raspberry vodka, red bull and cranberry. I had a few tall-boys for myself and Martine. He was playing house music and the Jerky Boys. We started to do flips onto the bed. We laughed about old times at Marist and sang the "Suck-N-Fuck-N-Joik" song, or anthem rather. We also brought up our old pals McGoorty, Cannefax, and the boy wonder Willie Hoppe, real first class champs.


Click for an enlarged view and read. You will not be dissapointed.

By 2 am the booze went dry and we hit the streets looking for a real Soho dive. We encountered an empty water bottle on the way and played a full soccer game with it on the streets of Soho. We climbed trees and slid down railings. We finally found the Soho Tavern (or something) a few blocks away. 8 sheets to the wind, we immediately get a few drinks. Bender put about $60 in the juke box, but I can't remember a single song except Bowie - Fame.

There was a lounge area in the back and there was a group of fellow twentysomethings enjoying themselves a good Soho evening (or early morning). The floors were hardwood and the big cushion chairs in the lounge had wheels. Chair races immediately ensued. I spilt half my Yuengling on myself. The fellow group of twentysomethings were loving our antics. We also did that trick where you go behind a couch and make it look like you're walking down stairs. I think we got a round of applause for that one.

The bar closed and Bender was talking to a woman named Tanya. Martine, Twist and I jogged home in the cold, climbing and sliding down trees. Twist bought a Gatorade and a bag of Cape Cod potato chips (which are damned good) from the store across the street from the hotel. The small, sort of Asian guy behind the counter yelled at us when we inquired about his sandwich menu. "No fuckeen samitch!"

Martine and I passed out on the floor. Bender came home, barfed up some tuna tar-tar in the sink, opened both Fiji waters from the mini bar ($10 for the big one, and $8 for the smaller one) also a bag of peanut M&Ms ($6) and brought an unopened bottle Amstel and Gray Goose to the desk and played a game of poker online.

While we watched the snow that morning, Bender threw two glasses out of the 14th story window. Another night in the books, and a great way to start the holiday season.

Some select images of the evening: